Mistreat Yourself to a Paincation in Sufferlandria

You think you Suffered when you rode that mountain in France? When you pounded over cobbles in Belgium? When you fought over dirt roads in Tuscany? HAHAHAHAHAHAH! You don’t know Suffering. On the shores of the great inland Lactic Acid Sea lies the proud, tortured nation of Sufferlandria. We are a country that knows no borders, only lactate thresholds. Most of our citizens have only recently discovered their Sufferlandrian lineage, and were washed onto our shores by waves of sweat and the tears of their vanquished competitors.

We warmly welcome tourists. Our landscape, like our populace, is rugged and varied. From the fiery caldera of Mount Sufferlandria to the vast, rolling expanses of the Amber Waves of Pain; from the sparsely-populated Whine Country to the merciless vortex of the Downward Spiral. Forget those weak countries. Only here do you discover your Sufferlandiran heritage. Only here are you truly home. Book visits through our exclusive travel agent: The Sufferfest.

Welcome. To Sufferlandria. Like fun, but not really.

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